"All the Feels" (part 1)

This past Sunday, our Pastor began a new sermon series titled, "All The Feels." Coincidental that many of us were already in a reminiscent mood considering it was the 15th anniversary of the 9/11 attacks on our country and we recalled how we watched in horror as terrorists flew planes into the twin towers located in New York city as well as the Pentagon, resulting in the loss of almost 3.000 American citizens. Not coincidental if you believe that God already had a message placed on the heart of one of His followers, who would be delivering a message about emotions to his flock. Let's face it: many of us had "all the feels" simply because of the remembrance of that day.

Our choir special was beautifully delivered by the talented singer Carla McAlexander, who bravely stood mid-stage and sang a rendition of Kari Jobe's song " I am not alone." The song is a reminder about how we all face trials, yet when we fix our eyes on Christ, we are never truly alone. Carla and Kevin are the proud parents of Morgan and Mason, and it was on December 11, 2014 when their lives changed as they learned that their beloved daughter had been involved in a car accident that would ultimately result in her gaining angel wings on July 3, 2015.

Morgan was an angel here on earth but God needed her elsewhere, and the McAlexander family is a living testimony as to how we must depend on God, despite our humanly inclinations to question why bad things happen to good people and doubt if we are truly alone in life. While I haven't had the chance to ask this question face-to-face with my friends, my heart tells me that after everything that they have had to endure, they would still answer that none of us are alone, as God has been their strength and they have clung to Morgan's favorite Bible verse that states, " I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." (Philippians 4:13)

There is a stereotype that women are more emotional than men; we are the definition of "All the Feels" much more than our male counterparts, but God made woman because he believed that man needed a companion. Not weaker, but complementary. All created in His Image, therefore containing all of the ingredients that our Maker possesses. Solemn or sappy. Hard or soft. Held-back tears or cry babies . His Image, and perfectly molded.

And on this particular Sunday, I could have been the poster child for the "All the Feels" campaign. I was carrying baggage that I had from Friday that involved uncertainties concerning one of the little girls in my class. Combined with the 9/11 anniversary and the beautiful tribute from my friend while carrying the burden of losing a child in her heart yet still declaring that we are still not alone, it was all I could do to not break down from the emotional overload.

Later that night in our small group, we were asked to complete the phrase "Above all else," The answers ranged from "Keep calm and carry on," "Sleep and sleep often," and "waffles"(child response) on the comedic side to "Love," "Forgive," "Seek God," and "trust God because man will fail." on the serious side. In the Bible, the phrase "Above all else" is followed by "guard your heart because everything you do flows from it." (Proverbs 4:23)

Your feelings and emotions are a window peering into your heart. It affects the way you see the world.

When my pastor spoke those words, they cut through me. Here I was, basically mourning the uncertainties that lied ahead for the little girl in my classroom while my friend was declaring, even as she herself mourned the loss of her only daughter, that we are not alone.

You see, my emotions had taken me to the dark side. I was already mourning a situation in which so much of the unknown had not yet come to light. I was heavy hearted and allowing that darkness to cloud the potential that God was showing me that He could handle and make beautiful. I was never worried about myself when it came to the welfare of the kids in my class, but instead always about them and for a second I allowed clarity to leave the scene and chaos to ensue.

I was choosing the darkness and He was crying out to me, "You are not alone and neither is she!"

I had bought *Katie a pair of shoes because the pair she always wore to school didn't fit her, and almost as if choosing to wallow in grief, I took a picture of them and looked at that picture all weekend. I asked myself things like, "Does she even have any shoes to wear?" and "Is she safe-wherever she is?" I think grief is a normal part of life, but my emotions had taken over and listening to my friend declare that we aren't alone despite the tragedy that her family had experienced helped me to look up and see that He holds the whole world in His hands.

Beloved, guard your heart. Choose Christ. If I had kept my eyes focused on my Heavenly Father, the guarantee that He could handle whatever situation Katie was in would have allowed this classroom mama to rest in Him. Just as Jesus has the power to give sight to the blind, his spirit is capable of guiding your emotions.

When we focus on the problem, we miss out on the blessing. He can calm the chaotic state of your mind. (Pastor Tim)

Father God,
I praise you for making me in Your Image! Thank you for the redirection that you are able to give me when I let my emotions lead me instead of your sweet spirit. Keep my eyes fixed on you because I know you have already overcome this world! Give me eyes to see things the way you do, and a heart to love as you have. Thank you for the precious people that you have placed in my life that are a symbol of what faith, hope, and love look like. Continue to pour out your blessings on those who acknowledge that even in the dark times, you are there. And give the assurance of abundant life that you have to those who need it.
Amen