I guess you could say that I am a pretty "Type A" person. I like my ducks in a row and when one of them takes a dive in the deep end of the pond, I can lose my cool. For instance, I set my alarm for 5:00am. I know that my snooze goes off every 9 minutes. I can hit my snooze 4 times and rise out of bed exactly at 5:36am, just enough time to get my shower, put my clothes on, and start putting my makeup on before I have to try to wake everyone else up. Clockwork.
Friday was different. Instead of hitting the snooze 4 times like usual, I got out of bed at 5:09 (One snooze hit) and was pretty proud of myself when I realized that I was like 29 minutes ahead of schedule. Enjoying the leisure time that God had given me, I suddenly felt urged to pray. I have some very specific people that I am praying about and their struggles with drug addiction and without worrying about the time (you mean we don't all do that?) I started crying out to God. "Break the chains, Father! Save this family! I have seen your glory, let me see it again!" Before I had a second to worry about the time, I realized that my hair was almost dry yet I was still in the shower. The Holy Spirit was so thick and no, it wasn't simply the steam if that is what you are thinking. My heart was beating fast and the voice that I was hearing was my Father telling me that He had heard my cry for these friends and He was already there to take care of it.
Singing God's praises all the way to work, I walked into my classroom and proclaimed to a friend that God was going to heal some people that were struggling with addiction. The Spirit moved through that room as my friend showed me the goosebumps on her arms. At recess, a little boy who usually won't come near me on the playground shadowed me for the longest time until I looked down to see him holding my hand, willingly. Was the Holy Spirit the cause of this? During my lunch break, I found a secluded place to sit and listen to worship music when a co-worker came in and I shared with him what I believe was the work of the Holy Spirit throughout my day as he teared up and lifted his hands in praise as he left the room. Was I actually becoming what I had asked God to make me? A vessel that God could use to bring a message to a world that so desperately wanted to hear it?
The last few weeks have been difficult, and worrying has become a regular part of my day. Every day I ask God to take care of something specific and the next day it is something totally different. Is it possible that this whole time God has been trying to show me that instead of focusing on my own life and what He could do for me, I should have instead been looking at what He could do for others if only I asked? And instead of being stuck looking at the time and the things on my to-do list, I should have surrendered my own life circumstances so that God could make the move that He so desperately wanted to make?
There's one final thing and I will shut up. Every day I walk up the street from my house to meet my kiddos when they get off the bus. During this time, I usually play on my phone or have conversations with the neighbors... Piddle around. This particular day was a little different. As I was stressing out about something in my own head, I looked up and noticed the tree that I was standing under. It was a pretty ordinary tree, but it wasn't the leaves that caught my attention, it was what was looking at me through the leaves. I tried to snap a picture, but the quality wasn't very good and you won't be able to see what I did in the picture I will share with you. It was the moon. Now I know it is not unheard of to see the moon during daylight hours, but as soon as I noticed it, a plane came into sight. The plane was going really fast and for a second I thought I was going to be able to take a picture of the plane flying toward the moon, but my angle was bad and I ended up crossing the street to try to get a better picture. As soon as I snapped the shot of the plane during this cat-and -mouse game I was playing, I realized that maybe there was a message that God was trying to tell me. The final picture that I took was of the plane flying above the tree, with a bright streak spanning from the left side of the pic to the right side above all of it. It was the sun.I realized that sometimes it is easy to get so fixated on what life looks like from the pilot's seat that we neglect to see that the one who created it all controls it in the palm of His hand. When my life looked like a plane crash was about to happen, realizing that the One who holds the entire universe in His hand gave me a reason to quit looking at all the factors that could cause me to panic and instead look to the Son who holds ME in the palm of His hand.
Beloved, you are a treasured treasure. Your life matters to Christ, and He died to prove that to you. I believe that God the Father, His Holy Spirit, and Christ Jesus want to walk through life with you and if you allow them to, they will move in ways that only they can. All throughout the Bible, you will find a message of love that comes from a Father that wants a relationship with His kids, but we have to allow Him in. Matthew 6:33 tells us to "Seek first his kingdom and righteousness, and all these things will be given to you." The next time you feel like the pilot of a plane that might be coasting along with nothing significant to report, or spiraling out of control hoping for a rescue, look to the One who holds the universe in the palm of His hand.
He knows your name, He knows your heart, and His love for you is perfect in every way.
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